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Post by Gillian on Nov 3, 2005 10:51:35 GMT -5
Last Friday was my son's Junior High Fundraiser. They hold a 'Fun Run' to raise money. It is a big event that people come back to the school to compete in year after year. Anyway, school is saying a bunch of boys (my son included) skipped part of the afternoon class to 'get ready' for the Run. They are supposed to stay in class until dismissed for the event. My son swears he did not skip, that he was in class until dismissed. I have to say I believe him. I really grilled him on this and he did not waver from his story (he is normally easy to trip up in a lie). The problem is he is on a truancy program and is not allowed any unexcused absences so it is a BIG DEAL. I have e-mailed the teacher involved and the school counselor but what can I do if the teacher swears he did skip. It's his word against the teachers. Of course, I'm sure it's going to sound as though I'm trying to get him out of hot water with the truancy people but I'm not. If he skipped then he has to deal with the consequences. He is naming people he was with to prove his point. I want to believe him but if he's so sure he's right and they are wrong why didn't he say so earlier? Can you hear the doubt starting to creep in here? Aaaaaaugh!
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Post by brazos on Nov 3, 2005 23:21:47 GMT -5
All I can say is the older they get the more they lie to you. It is very frustrating but if I believed everything my son said I would look stupid. He may be right but since he is in this truancy program it is a Big Deal, but I think you need to step back and let him come clean or accept consequences.
I have told my sons the prisons are full of innocent people just ask them. I also think a big problem with teens is they honestly don't want to accept responsibilty. If he did the right thing his past reputation is paving his future, next time he will be sure to be seen where he was. I know as a mom this is much harder for you, but you know he has a lesson here.
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Post by Gillian on Nov 4, 2005 10:48:20 GMT -5
Well, I'm still giving him the benefit of the doubt at the moment but we will see. I've e-mailed his teacher and counselor - of course it's been 24 hours and still no reply! Things are a mess for him right now (all his own doing) and he's feeling overwhelmed. Never a good space for him to be in. I think things have to hit rock bottom now before they start going back up but it's definitely not fun to be around.
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Post by brazos on Nov 5, 2005 21:07:12 GMT -5
Gill this is the hard part when you feel he probably did the right thing this time but his past is catching up with him. Look at it this way as hard as it is, he will learn a lot from this.
We learn a lot more from failure than success, and also as I told my son one time when he was in a pickle, you have nowhere to go but up.
I know it is very hard to love him so deeply and not be able to help him succeed at times. Unfortunately I think it comes with having a teen ADHD or not.
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Post by Gillian on Nov 9, 2005 9:25:48 GMT -5
Well, needless to say the teacher and counselor never got back to me. Finally my husband called the Principal who said there was a lot of confusion on that day!
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