|
Post by ilovemyboys on Oct 27, 2005 7:57:48 GMT -5
I wanted to share an idea a friend gave me for school reports. It is called a "positive report" and it consists of a list of the positive things the child has done that day. It goes home to the parents and the parents can reward the child based on how many positives they get. I started this yesterday, because we all know that we get all the negative behaviors told to us, but none of the positives. Whereas I know the teacher tells my son when he is doing well, I don't hear about it...Therefore the only feedback my son tends to get from me is when he's done something wrong. So yesterday he came home with 4 positive things that he did. His dad and I talked about it and told him how great it was. We set up a system whereby he will get rewards based on the number of positives he gets, we will accumulate them and the rewards will get bigger. This way my son will (hopefully ) be looking for positive things to do and it can improve his behavior in the classroom. I wanted to share this advise because I'm very excited about it...I love being able to go over all the good things he's done that day, b/c it is such a different experience!! It also cheers me up, esp. when as an ADHD parent I get pretty discouraged sometimes! I hope this idea helps someone else!
|
|
|
Post by d on Oct 27, 2005 8:25:16 GMT -5
This is an AWESOME brilliant idea. Please let me know how it goes. Is it a structured list or does the teacher write down what she wants? Are you targeting certain behaviors?
I have seen firsthand the unbelievable progress my dd has made in the last 5-6 years being in POSITIVE classrooms. Somehow, the majority of her teachers have been instinctive about this and ran their classrooms on this premise. Believe me, these have been structured high expectations learning environments, emphasis on kids supporting, respecting each other & doing their best and known as best behaved well-mannered classes throughout the school. These teachers have been truly talented and we've been privileged that my dd was in them. The unbelievable thing is they managed their classrooms without raising their voice - it was the teacher's look, a verbal cue/prompt that got wayward kids back on track, not yelling. I could go on forever about this describing some of these teachers' tactics but they were inventive and effective. I could see them doing something like this idea.
It is extremely hard for adults to understand that ADHDers respond best to positive reinforcement AND for the adults to remember to consistently note the positives. Also, parents/teachers need to figure out how/when to use for effective results. It is human nature to dwell on the negative so it's a reconditiong for the adults. Positive does not mean lack of structure, accountability or spoiling kids if used right. We do positive discipline at home too.
I'll shut up now. In case you haven't noticed, I am *passionate* about this topic.
|
|
|
Post by ilovemyboys on Oct 27, 2005 9:27:46 GMT -5
I'm hoping it works for us. It is a very informal list - the teacher just keeps a pad by her desk and notes anything positive, no matter how big or small. Then she writes it in his assignment pad at the end of the day. For example, yesterday she had things such as "he said excuse me to get my attention" , he wrote his assignments in his pad accurately and packed his backpack correctly
I know his teacher is trying hard to be positive, but there are aides in the room that aren't always positive...and with ADHD behaviors I know it is very hard to stay positive. That is why I"m praying that he will WANT to do the good behaviors in order to get the rewards.
Its also selfish on my part - I'm tired of only hearing the bad!!
|
|
|
Post by Mayleng on Oct 27, 2005 9:34:09 GMT -5
That is wonderful, wonderful.
I am sure it will work. I also noticed both my kids, ADHD and Not, always performed better for a teacher who encourages them instead of being negative.
|
|
|
Post by G on Oct 28, 2005 10:10:19 GMT -5
That is awesome that the teacher is working with you. She sounds like a terrific person, they are so busy during the day. Sounds like she is willing to go the extra mile.
|
|
|
Post by ilovemyboys on Oct 28, 2005 13:21:51 GMT -5
Yes, I have been extremely lucky the past 2 years in my school. The teachers have been wonderful. I did have my horrible teacher before, so I know to appreciate this.
|
|
|
Post by RobbysMom on Oct 28, 2005 18:49:11 GMT -5
This is an awesome idea that more parents and teachers should try! It's great that the teacher is working with you because I'm sure this is helping her too. I believe the aides really are influenced by the teacher and the enviroment she sets, so hopefully if the teacher stays positive the aides will too!
|
|
|
Post by redfaun on Nov 1, 2005 15:56:00 GMT -5
What a wonderful idea. I have never thought of doing that. I will present this idea to his teacher at the p/t confrence next week. We only have 15 minutes per student for the confrence so I hope it will be enough time. I may have to send her an e-mail a head of time to see if she is game to give this a try. My husband said that there is nothing to loose by presenting this idea to the teacher. We don't know the teacher well enough to know how flexible/helpful she is willing to be to help build my dd's self esteem. I too believe that our ADHD children receive more negative than positive feedback. It's got to be hard. Heck, it's hard enough on me and I'm not the one with ADHD! Thanks for the idea. I'll let you know what the teacher says after the confrence on 11/9.
|
|
|
Post by swmom on Nov 1, 2005 16:15:06 GMT -5
GOOD idea!
|
|
|
Post by brazos on Nov 2, 2005 9:10:18 GMT -5
Hardhead had a responsibility folder at school, it was negative oriented. This is a perfect alternative, kids need reinforcement of good behavior!
|
|