Change in Living Space at Home for Millennial

[babette]

When it rains it pours. We find ourselves in reduced financial circumstances. One solution for us is to move into a smaller flat. It's very charming, but technically a 1 bedroom. There IS room to create a partitioned mostly-private space for when our daughter is home on school breaks. Do you think this is OK? She is used to having her own room and we have the typical mixed feelings about this: she should always have a room of her own at home vs. she needs to be comfortable here but not too comfortable! Dd has lived on her own in the past, in apartments with roommates and with a roommate at college. She is pretty messy, but it hasn't seemed to affect her friendships. I have looked up creative partitioned spaces and many are very cool. Thoughts?

[eoffg]

Babette, having lots of space. Is a major cause of it becoming messy, as it can take a lot of stuff to fill it up.
But with a smaller space, it can force us to use it more efficiently?

[babette]

I love living in small spaces. When I was little my family summered on the Cape and had the best little cottage. That's my fantasy. I figure if I could live there for an entire season with X amount of stuff, I can live anywhere with X amount of stuff. My daughter has real EF concerns though and her "overflow" could be a real stressor for me. She also has problems tossing stuff. Sigh.

[healthy11]

Part of a child's maturing is realizing that they can't always get what they want, and that other people have needs, too. Learning doesn't just take place in a classroom.

I don't know if you and your spouse have ever talked to your daughter about money before, but since she's previously lived in her own apartment, she should have a general idea about how bigger units typically charge higher rents, etc. While you may not want to give her all the details about your personal accounts, you shouldn't feel guilty letting her know that your financial situation has changed, and you've decided to downsize.

I'm not clear if you plan to partition off part of the only bedroom in your new unit to be a space for your daughter, or if you're talking about keeping the bedroom for yourself, while sectioning off an area in the living room for her to stay in when she's home from college? I'd be reluctant to have her reside in the same sleeping area with you, but if you have a futon or Murphy bed in another room, that should be okay.

As far as your daughter having too many "overflow" possessions, if she doesn't feel that she can part with them, do you have any other relatives (ie, aunts/uncles/grandparents) who might be able to keep a few boxes of her stuff at their places? Otherwise, even renting a storage locker should be far less expensive than having to pay rent on a larger flat. (ie, www.cubesmart.com )

Once your daughter has graduated, you might want to set some financial boundaries, as well: www.forbes.com/sites/nextavenue/2016/07/24/how-boomer-parents-can-stop-babying-their-millennials-financially/#b2e1e7f60055

[babette]

Thanks everyone. We would make a partition near the living room, which is very large. I was visiting Pintrest and other sites and saw some very cool ideas. There comes a time when baby really truly doesn't live "at home" much any more and that's OK with all of us. I think.