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Post by mrsb00 on Sept 2, 2005 8:48:35 GMT -5
in the gut. Why is it no matter how well you prepare yourself for those meetings you always walked away feeling that way? I've been so upset since the minute I walked out of the school door.  I had a meeting with them to go over some accomodations for my son (2nd grader). I have spent a lot of time researching accomodations, an hour typing up my request. I get there and the teacher starts showing my son's work compared to other students. He is at the bottom. He is starting out this year doing basic review and earning D's. Granted, this was prior to meds. I started him on his new meds (Focalin XR 10 mg) this Tuesday and the teacher did say that was his best day so far. He said he was afraid that my son didn't have the skills yet to do 2nd grade work and that was a concern to him. Nothing they were saying or the work they were showing me surprised me in any way. I've heard it before, but I still feel like I was kicked in the gut. They offered a few very basic accomodations (seating in front of the class, buddy to help with materials, modify assignments as needed, cues to stay on task). This was nothing compared to my list, which I didn't even whip out once I saw theirs. I asked about modifying the number of spelling words or math problems required for a test-the teacher wouldn't go for that, saying that wasn't fair. I explained that my son can't read! How is he supposed to continue without reading? They said he did qualify for Title I and he would receive those services. I felt rushed having only 30 minutes before school started. I've been in tears now wondering if I should have retained him. I still can, but I don't agree entirely that will solve the problem. I can see that my son doesn't have the skills starting out this year, I can see he didn't have the skills at the end of 1st grade. Where is the help for my child? He is going to fall further and further behind, but what other choice to I have? I have enlisted the help of a tutor, but that isn't enough. I was really hoping to get somewhere with the school, but I can see that I haven't. I just don't know what to do now... Dana |
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Post by d on Sept 2, 2005 9:18:17 GMT -5
What testing has the school done on him for them to make those statements about qualifying for title 1, comments on being left back, agreeing to limited informal accomodations, etc. Have you formally requested special ed testing? If not put it in a letter - that puts them on a clock with a deadline. Also, I agree with you about retainment - more of the same is not going to work. You may want to put in the letter that he has been dx'd as ADHD Inattentive which has the highest comorbidity with learning DIFFFERENCES and LD's.
So sorry for you also. My dd's worst years were 1st and 2nd grade - she had so many academic gaps and securing what she needed was not fun. We wound up getting help from the school begrudgingly - they classified her as Other Health Impaired after a six month battle with them. She got resource room, she was also in supportive reading, supportive math (the supportive help was not special ed) and private Orton Gillingham reading tutoring. The OG tutoring helped the most while the other school services helped round out bringing her up to speed.
While I know it is sad and stinks - just keep telling yourself you are doing the right thing. Early correct intervention is what saved my dd. Had I listened to my idiotic school and waited until the middle of 2nd grade or beginning of 3rd grade for her to show that magic LD discrepency criteria, I think it would've been the wrong special ed classification AND too little help too late. She certainly would not have gotten the right reading help. The recent IDEA laws are trying to get schools away from the LD discrepency gap plus it shouldn't apply to OHI. I'm rambling but my point is you'll need to take charge to find out WHY his reading is behind so that he has the right reading program as well as how/why on everything else for the right help.
Hang in there. You have support here.
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Post by 2pearl on Sept 2, 2005 9:23:25 GMT -5
Dana, I'm sorry you had such an upsetting meeting. Has your son been tested for learning disabilites? My middle son (no ADHD) has very severe learning disabilities, was tested in first grade and now has an IEP. If your son hasn't been tested it certainly sounds like he needs to be.
If he does have LD's then retaining wouldn't have done any good anyway.
There are plenty of people here that I know can give more specific advice, I'm still a bit wobbly myself and hesititate to make recommendations. But I do think you should also post this over at schwablearning.org on their message boards. That board really helped me figure out what to do when I was just starting down this road.
Hang in there.
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Post by Mayleng on Sept 2, 2005 9:28:32 GMT -5
Dana, I would ask the school what THEY are going to do to help your son keep up and how they are going to remediate him to bring him up to grade level - afterall, that is their job. I would continue to keep an eye on the reading and find out if he does have dyslexia. If you suspect he does, make sure he learns reading thru' a Systematic multisensory way. There are various programs that help dyslexic kids like Lindamood Bell (very expense but big results), Orton Gillingham etc. I know you have a tutor for your son, is she familiar with these methods, is she using these methods? If not, you might want to find one who does or if you can afford it and if there is one near you, go to a Lindamood bell clinic.
My son could not read in 1st grade either, we did not know he had ADHD/Inattentive at that time, and thought he was dyslexic. Once he was put on meds and I had a tutor go back to the basics of reading with him (for two months, 3 times a week, with me going over the previous day's lesson with him on days he did not have tutoring - basically, he learnt to read 6 days a week for two months for 1 hour a day), he went from non reader to 3rd grade level (he was only in first grade). He has no problems reading now (his main problem is written expression, which is his LD). What i am saying is if his Meds work, and you continue with his tutoring but still do not see him being able to read, then it is more than just ADHD. Whichever way it is, even if you get outside tutoring, you will still need to pursue getting him an IEP under OHI (Other Health Impaired) for his ADHD IF he is still struggling, if you cannot get him identified as having a Specific Learning Disability.
Take a break for now, sort out the med situation ie. find one that works first, so that he can retain what he has learnt. See if focalin XR helps. Then see if it is just ADHD or ADHD cormobid with an LD. It is like peeling an Onion, one layer at a time.
It's a tough road, you need to educate yourself on Sped Ed Laws to "play" with the school.
Next time, when they say, that your son does not have the skills and is behind, turn it around to them (the educators) and ask what they are going to do to bring your son up to grade level. What programs do they have to help him instead of putting it back on the child and retaining him. What makes them think that putting him back in the same grade and teaching him the same way is going to help him learn when it has failed before? Ask them back. Tell them that you have gotten a tutor and have been helping your child outside of school and seeking medical help (you are doing your Part), WHAT is the SCHOOL going to do to help your child? Put it on them to answer you, after all THEY are the EDUCATORS.
Go on the offensive (not in an emotional, or angry way but reasoned, measured and calm). Basically, ask them what THEY are going to do about it.
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Post by mrsb00 on Sept 2, 2005 11:10:37 GMT -5
D-Yes, I have asked for testing for my son by the school, which they did not pursue due to his achievement scores. They simply believe he has low average ability. Therefore I had him tested privately where he did qualify as average, however in the low end, and his scores did not indicate a LD. You can see his scores in my thread about whether I should retain him. The only thing that was mentioned about Title I was apparently he was administered a reading test and qualified. I have no idea what kind of test they gave him.
Mayleng- I have tried to educate myself on the Spec. Ed laws but I find it all very confusing. It's as if one road leads to another, you know? I'm seriously considering hiring an advocate. Any idea how I go about finding one?
I will give the new meds a chance and see how it goes for a the rest of the quarter (which ends Oct. 21). I am going to have to kick it into gear this year. The principal was basically telling me not to have him tested for dyslexia until 3rd grade because of the discrepancies not showing until then since that is when he will have really gotten the exposure to reading and written expression. HELLO! He can't read the basic sight words like THE, AND, IT, WAS! How is he going to survive? Those transitional words are a killer for him because they don't describe anything-he can't tie them to the next word. I do agree that it needs to be turned around on them. They are basically saying he has to have some responsibility and not be so dependent on others.
I do not know if the tutor is familiar with any of the methods you have mentioned above. I think she too is trying to get an idea of where he is at.
Thank you all for your responses. I do feel better, although I feel that it is me against them. Right now I am not getting any support from my son's father (who whole heartedly thought he needed retained) and even my DH doesn't agree. They both felt he wasn't ready. The testing shows me he has the ability to do the work, so something needs to be figured out as to why it's not getting done.
Dana
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Post by notab on Sept 2, 2005 11:26:22 GMT -5
Dana, This all sounds SO like my 7 year old ds. The reading test that they likely gave your son was the Dibels test. After hearing about how poorly my son did last year on whatever tests they were doing and having no idea, I finally figured it out from posts on message boards such as this one (the schools sure don't make this easy, do they?). Not doing well on the Dibels test is an indication that your son may have dyslexia, so why don't they tell you that? I guess that they are waiting for him to get REALLY behind before they are willing to do something about it. Or it may be like my school district where I think they never offer multisensory reading in most of the schools, even if the child has dyslexia. Sorry for the venting. Anyway, my ds was also tested by the school last year and also showed not a great IQ (95) and no LDs. However they wanted to put him in self contained for reading - why if no LD?  And no one thinks that the 95 score is accurate, they admitted that much but still no real help. As part of putting our ds on meds this summer, we did some testing privately that showed dyslexia. And yes, it can be diagnosed before third grade. I would suggest that you do private testing to get the dx, it is not worth waiting on the schools. Check with parents of dyslexic kids in your area to see who might diagnose. Or maybe there is a parent support group. They can check for it in a number of ways as early as first grade. For us the meds made a BIG difference. With those, I was able to work with my son on reading over the summer and now he is no longer behind on that. We have a multisensory reading program tutor now so that he can continue to stay with or ahead of his class on reading. Just talked to the teacher this morning and she says he is doing great in reading (knock on wood). Title 1 reading programs are not what your son needs if he is dyslexic. By the way, those sight words you mentioned are the worst for these kids to remember. We work on them daily, because if we don't my ds will forget them. They are not in long term memory despite many hours spent on them. We have had great luck with the teachers, but not with the testers at our school. It must be really rough to not have the support of anyone there! My heart goes out to you. By the way, my son is classified for SPED under OHI for ADHD. All dyslexia accoms are informal (like I said - great teacher) for now. Cindy |
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Post by VaMom on Sept 2, 2005 11:55:49 GMT -5
D-Yes, I have asked for testing for my son by the school, which they did not pursue due to his achievement scores. They simply believe he has low average ability. Therefore I had him tested privately where he did qualify as average, however in the low end, and his scores did not indicate a LD. Mayleng- I have tried to educate myself on the Spec. Ed laws but I find it all very confusing. It's as if one road leads to another, you know? I'm seriously considering hiring an advocate. Any idea how I go about finding one? ..... HELLO! He can't read the basic sight words like THE, AND, IT, WAS! How is he going to survive? Those transitional words are a killer for him because they don't describe anything-he can't tie them to the next word. I do agree that it needs to be turned around on them. .... Dana, First of all, as others have said,  you had to go through this... From what you have written, it sounds like your ds has a serious processing issue ... because I can tell you it is NOT his IQ that is keeping him from reading simple words. A person with a low average to average IQ can absolutely be a proficient reader. A person with a below average IQ can be a decent reader as well. So do not let them feed you some garbage that this is an ability issue. It is not. I think an advocate is an excellent idea. I would call the Office of Civil Rights, or I would put your state's name and special education advocate into Google and see what comes up, or I would check on www.wrightslaw.comfor some ideas. You're getting a very raw deal and your ds cannot afford that. I know advocates are $$$ but I think in this case you need to do it if at all possible. Hang in there, you're going to solve this... as Mayleng said, it just takes time and a lOT of effort. |
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Post by Beverly on Sept 2, 2005 13:52:15 GMT -5
On the good side, I had an experience similar to Mayleng's with my ds. He could not read finishing first grade. He had started meds for ADHD Combined type toward the end of first grade. We had him in Catholic School and the public district refused to give assitance since he did not require an IEP. We moved for this reason and he received in school Corrective Reading from a Reading Specialist 3 times a week-many districts call this Basic Skills Reading-I believe this is what you will get with Title I. I would ascertain if this is the case because many districts hire regular elementary teachers and not Reading Specialists, making it useless. Corrective Reading was the best thing in the world for my son and he caught up by the end of second grade and did not need to go the following year.
He could not read the basic (dolci list) sight words, he could not go through "man, fan, can , pan" without forgetting what sound the "an" made! Many kindergarteners are using "inventive spelling" by mid-year and most by the end of the year. My son was still using random letters at mid-first grade, he had finally graduated to inventive spelling after he started taking meds. I too thought he may be dyslexic but it all had to do with the ADHD and his inability to focus long enough to retain information.
Push for more information about what he is going to get with Title I. Good Luck. My son is 13 now and read The DaVinci Code last year for a book report!
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Post by Mayleng on Sept 2, 2005 20:40:19 GMT -5
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Post by brazos on Sept 2, 2005 21:48:14 GMT -5
I think you have to remember you know your child not these two. I have seen a kid (not mine) go from not passing a single subject to making almost Perfect on the Math TAKS test the next year, all from a diagnosis and a willing teacher.
Teachers do not know my son like I know him, it is their job to teach every kid in the room whether they like it or not.
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Post by mrsb00 on Sept 3, 2005 20:09:51 GMT -5
Thanks again everyone. I am definitely feeling better today having some time to adjust. All of your posts and insight have been so wonderful. Thank you.
Mayleng-I am in Illinois, however a few hours south of your friend (Springfield area). I will definitely look her up on chat. I did look for advocates off of the Wrightslaw site. I just don't know if we can afford one, but I won't know for sure until we look into it a little further.
In the meantime I have put in place a reward system for my son in reading. I checked out several beginning reader books from the library, a lot of Dr. Suess. If I can build up his confidence by going back to the basics and have him read to me so many minutes a day he can earn a reward such as a video game rental. I think that will motivate him.
Today was the first day I actually saw firsthand how he is doing on the new Focalin XR. I would say much better. He was still a little quiet, but not completely withdrawn like he had been before. We read for 25 minutes and I could tell he was trying, but I felt so bad for him having to struggle over the basic words like then, they, there....heartbreaking. He was able to watch tv in my bedroom without standing on his head or jumping up and down on my bed or managing to pull the valance down again....lol.
I really believe that this school is not equipped to deal with students who are a little more complex. The principal was totally trying to pacify me with those general accomodations and I didn't feel they offered anything specific to my son's needs. As I mentioned earlier, I will wait until the end of the 1st quarter and if he hasn't improved, which I'm sure he most likely won't, I will be going back
Dana
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And no one thinks that the 95 score is accurate, they admitted that much but still no real help.
