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Post by willoweezie on May 17, 2004 8:34:31 GMT -5
UGH! I got a call before 8 am from "the woman" who obviously expected to get my voicemail. She wants to discuss I don't know what... I am a basket case  I'll let you know what's up |
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Post by willoweezie on May 17, 2004 10:54:51 GMT -5
Oh yipee! I have a reprieve until the fall. She kindly agreed that moving S now would be too disruptive to her, but "feels strongly that she needs a therapeutic, small, sturctured environment". She said the school is more than willing to work with her for the rest of the year, but they agree that they are not the right place for her, even though she has made 'slight' improvements. I am sooooo mad, upset, what the h%ll choice do I have really? I really don't know what to do...
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Post by LurkNoMore on May 17, 2004 14:14:37 GMT -5
Hi Willow...you KNOW I feel your pain! C's school has laid off the hard sell (for now), but the teacher did ask me to come in today to observe him (I guess she wanted to show me that he is different than the other kids...as if I didn't already know that). The funny thing is that even before he knew I was there (she asked me to observe from the hallway at first), he was doing his work fairly independently. She was doing a science lesson with the rest of the class (the big state 4th grade science test is next week) and he was working on an essay about his weekend (he did get distracted for a little bit, erased too hard and made a hole in his paper and then played around with his pencil). While he was completing his essay, she had the rest of the class do a practice science test (I'm still not sure why she didn't have him do one) and then when more than 1/2 of the class left for strings or TAG (Talented and Gifted), she played a Science Review Game with the rest of them (and asked C to join). He did really well...sat fairly still and quiet (she had to ask one of the better behaved boys to stop fidgeting) and knew some of the answers. Then it was center time (he had to finish his math and then would be allowed to participate...but by the time it was lunch, he still had 2 problems to finish). I worked on his math with him while Mrs. B did one center and Mrs. L (the aide) did another center. I left while he was at recess. Her plan is to have him do his seat work in the morning and then work with the class in the afternoon. She even commented that his morning was better than usual (not sure if it was because I was there or if the Risperdal is making a difference). Hubby has Friday off, so I told her that he would be in then to observe. Sorry to hijack your thread Willow...just wanted to let you know that I empathize with you. We are still leaning towards the self-contained (but I'm not letting anyone at the school know until I need to give them the decision) Gotta run and pick up my daughter from school! {{{HUGS}}}  |
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Post by dfp on May 20, 2004 8:56:51 GMT -5
Ugh. You guys are in such a tough spot. But I have to say it again. Isn't there ANY way you can get to an advocate or lawyer to help you? It is against the law to pressure a family into choosing a restrictive environment for your child. ESPECIALLY, as in Willow's case, where member's of Sages out-of-school team (ped., psych., mom) disagree with the placement. Willow, have you indicated to this woman (calmly, or to her voicemail), that you are familiar with the Least Restrictive Environment part of the law and that there isn't consensus by Sage's team that such an evironment would constitute APPROPRIATE education for her? It might make them back off. The key words are "least restrictive environment" and "appropriate". They are the LEGAL terms that the school staff should be familiar with. If you express yourself in terms of emotions and things being disruptive to either Sage or the classroom teacher, then you are playing into their hands. They can manipulate you at that point. You MUST use the legal terminology in conversations/ voicemails, etc. in order to get anywhere. Read the following article on students with disabilities, least-restrictive environment & self-contained classrooms. Maybe it will be helpful. tinyurl.com/29h25I don't mean to be a pain. But I see these schools trying to do something that's completely not allowed and they appear to be making your lives miserable. You've got enough on your plate. YOu don't deserve this. If you're not sure where to turn, if you want to send me through a PM or something your city & state, I'll be happy to try to dig up some names of advocates or SPED lawyers. They don't all cost a bazillion dollars. I know that here there are special ed law centers for low-income families. Good luck. Hang in there!!!!! dfp |
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Post by LurkNoMore on May 20, 2004 12:10:27 GMT -5
Thanks for the link, DFP...it was very informative!  I think in our case, the school would be covered (see below for stuff I cut and pasted from the link). C does currently have an aide and is still having a tough go of it. He would probably benefit from the smaller class size. Also, the self-contained in our district is in a regular elementary school...they do mainstream the kids as much as they are able. Our IEP meeting has been rescheduled to next Tuesday (I'm just waiting for the secretary to call me back again...she called me yesterday with the time). C was sent home sick on Tuesday (sore throat that has been going around), stayed home yesterday and today. He should be OK to go back tomorrow. Next week is the state 4th grade science testing...I would like to defer our decision until the end of the year, if possible and at least find out which class they think he would go into if he stayed. Hubby thinks we need to definitely make up our mind by the meeting. We are going to sit down with C this weekend and have a long talk about it. This morning C said he would try it out (and if he didn't like it he would go back to HIS school)... I'll keep you all posted! |
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Post by willoweezie on May 20, 2004 16:24:33 GMT -5
That article was interesting, however I think in our case too they can support their postition that she requires a more restrictive environment for several reasons. One being the incident with picking her teeth (harm to herself) and needing a smaller ratio (she currently does some of her work each day in a catch all resource room, with kids that they describe as not being her peers (mostly MR kids)). I still stand by my theory that the most alarming behaviors occurred shortly after increasing her dosage of zoloft, which doesn't make them less alarming, but to me mean that it is not just something that might happen any random day with her. Unfortunately, S's therapist really agrees with the school and has jumped in on the campaign to sway me, convince me that I would be doing the right thing for her by taking her out of the environment that is making her so uncomfortable. She does not manage S's meds, and her perspective all along has been the emotional/behavioral issues, not the fact that they have a neurological imbalance (or what have you) as their basis, which I really believe. Not that she will turn into the perfect child when we figure out the meds, but she will be able to function better in school when we do that, and determine what other pieces of the puzzle are causing the emotional problems.
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Post by dfp on May 20, 2004 22:25:59 GMT -5
UGH. I'm so sorry this is such a mess for you. My son became psychotic about a month ago (hearing voices, hallucinating, etc) and we were on full-scale red alert-- turns out he was having a bad reaction to his meds. When we weaned him off the psychosis dissapeared. (Not, though, the symptoms that made us put him on meds in the first place...  So I understand the med component. But as always, these situations are very complex. And I'm sorry that it's hard and more sorry that you're getting pressure from the school. It shouldn't be this way, right? I really believe in the "gut feelings" of the parents. But of course, I also wish there was a way to KNOW we are right. Oh, for a crystal ball... Hang in there, dfp |
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So I understand the med component.