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Post by swmom on Nov 20, 2003 15:50:35 GMT -5
 We are so fortunate that our 9-year-old daughter attends a school that focuses on character development and works hard to integrate that into all areas. They assign a character trait to each month and then literally study it, read about it, etc. etc. all month long. At the end of the month, the children actually vote on the kids who have epitomized that trait. They have a special assembly to recognize these kids. This has worked wonders with our ADHD child. Makes her think about how she acts, how she treats others, etc. We like the changes we're seeing. We decided to bring that same idea into our home by developing a chart with the monthly traits they are studying at school. For example, October was responsibility. Everytime I noticed - at home - that she was being particularly responsible, she got a smiley face sticker on the chart. If she earned 10 smiley faces for the month, she got to go get a toy or a book or whatever she wanted for $10 or less. This was working so well that we decided to add self control along with the monthly trait. Everytime I notice her using self control, she gets a smiley face, too. It has worked beautifully and it's really helping her become AWARE of what all these words really mean. We couldn't be more pleased. Just thought I'd pass this on.
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Post by Mayleng on Nov 20, 2003 21:17:48 GMT -5
This sounds special. I don't know if I can get our school to do it, but I wonder how much we can duplicate at home. I copied it to give to school psych.
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Post by swmom on Nov 21, 2003 7:08:14 GMT -5
I try to "catch her being good." Sometimes this involves stretching things a little. What I mean by that is she'll come home from school and usually winds up complaining about this kid named Cameron. He just drives her crazy. Her constant complaining about him drives us nuts! And the stuff that bothers her about him is just personality-related. He's not a bully or anything. So, we have given her some healthy solutions for dealing with him and then we said, "We don't want to hear about Cameron anymore, at all!" So, if I notice that she doesn't mention him, I say, "You know what, I notice that you haven't brought up Cameron's name lately and that's good self control. You're thinking about him, but you're dealing with him in your mind, instead of complaining about him out loud. That's good self control. " This dialogue seems to help her curb the impulsive to just whine constantly. It's important to let them know if something is really bugging them, that, yes, of course, TELL us. But the idea is to help them understand when to talk about it and when enough is enough.
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Post by JV on Nov 21, 2003 8:37:46 GMT -5
This is awesome. We had this happen last year for my son in his 5th grade class. They studied the words "honorable, integrity, responsibility,..." He would come home and tell me about something, and then just blow me away with how candidly he could speak on something and tell me about how he thought things should have gone, he also got to the point that he would say things and "not tatle" on people too. He learned some very valuable things, I was very happy the teacher started this. Im sure many kids in the class benefited from this. JV
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Post by vickilyn32 on Nov 21, 2003 9:17:01 GMT -5
Our school started the same thing 3 years ago. Along with each months character builder, one grade would do a program about that months word. My son was a respect cheerleader, skirt and all. there were 6 boys altogether, and they stole the show. Talk about an ego booster, just what he needed being adhd in 5th grade. He is now in 7th and the kids still talk about it. Our school uses the program all the way through highschool. this one is called the six pillars of character. There was a right up in the paper about it each year asking the community to participate.
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Post by faith7th on Nov 21, 2003 10:13:38 GMT -5
I am so glad it is working for you !
Our school does something similiar. Each quarter they have Character kid awards. My two boys ( one in K and one in 1st grade) Both got them this last assembly day. SO you just know I was one proud mama up there with my digi cam. The kids really know what the award is about too. It is nice that other important things(the most important thing if you ask me !) like their characters are celebrated and not just academic successes.
I think some of the schools are finally getting a clue !!!!
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Post by Mayleng on Nov 21, 2003 14:07:56 GMT -5
Is this some kind of official program? I'd like to get my hands on some of the word/definitions/examples to use with the kids. It might help me sell it to the school as well. Is there a name of this program? Something I can search on the Web?
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Post by swmom on Nov 21, 2003 17:06:49 GMT -5
Millermom -
Look up "charlotte mecklenburg schools" on the internet. Find "visit schools", go to "Cotswold Elementary" , then go to: "school website" , then "character education. There you'll find a broad description of what the program is all about but it's pretty general. What you will find is a list of the character traits for this year. Perhaps that's a good place to start. I'll try to see if I can round up more specific information for you.
We are new to the school this year but apparently the district superintendent was so impressed with the character education program at this school that he
has demanded that it be taught system-wide. That
speaks volumes for the importance of the direct teaching of these skills, not just hoping that the kids will get the character education they need at home and/or at church. Very, very interesting trend I think.
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Post by swmom on Nov 21, 2003 17:10:26 GMT -5
Millermom -
One more thing. I think that one reason why this is so effective at least at the school level is that the kids are lavishly rewarded and honored not only by the teachers but especially by their peers for showing good character.
My daughter's teacher said that she sees the kids hold each other accountable all the time. "That's not showing good character, " they say to one another. Can you imagine? This is actually going on at our school.
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Post by Mayleng on Nov 21, 2003 21:20:02 GMT -5
Thanks for the info.
We are big on character in our house, we are raising a pair of good old fashion boys. They have great traites already but, being boys don't always keep them front and center, especially at home. I was telling some moms about it after school today and they were interested in it as well. Right now our school has this "No put downs, pass it around" theme. Its OK but very very limited it what it's meant to convey and teach.
I will let you know how it goes. I have to meet with the school psych in a few weeks. He always says I keep him on his toes. He has turned out to be a great resource of information for me and I for him. I think he'd be really interested in this. If not the whole school, than for maybe some of the kids he has to work with on a regular basis.
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Post by jwm on Nov 22, 2003 18:33:17 GMT -5
HI my sons class has "class meetings" every week. They discuss ways to help eachother out, ways to improve their class, and they have "take a compliment, give a compliment" . They each sit in a circle and may take a turn to give one of their classmates a compliment for working hard, or trying hard, participating, etc. My son who is very quiet has shown more confidence and feels like a true part of his class. It is a great way to discuss feelings and feel a part of a community.
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Post by swmom on Dec 2, 2003 12:27:30 GMT -5
Hi all -
Yesterday, a December calendar came home with my child and it had several things that would enable me to be more specific in exactly her school integrates character education in everything they do. Starting with the calendar itself, rather than leave the Saturday and Sunday blocks blank, they include character quotes pertaining to that month's character trait(Dec. is caring) such as "Life's most persistent and urgent question is: What are you doing for others?" (Martin Luther King) These quotes are also found all over the school, i.e. in the hallways, in the classrooms, the cafeteria, the gym.
On the calendar for this week, among other things, are
Girls on the Run, an afterschool activity for 3rd-5th grade girls which addresses goal-setting, positive self-image through making healthy choices, etc. and the monthly meeting of the Character Club, another afterschool activity in which the kids engage in various
community public service projects. Later on in the month is the monthly Character Assembly in which the
Character Kids of the Month, voted on by their classmates, are announced and honored. Each class K-5 votes on a classmate who demonstrates the character trait for that month. Then, pictures of all the winners are posted on the bulletin board in the lobby for that month with quotes from their classmates on why they were chosen. It's really special. And quite an honor to be chosen for this. It really gets the kids thinking about themselves and how they're acting. For example, yesterday my daughter came home and said, "Mom, do you think I'm a caring person?" I was floored! Another item on the calendar is the winter class party right before we break for the holidays. Instead of having a party for themselves, the kids will put together a Christmas goody basket and deliver it to a nursing home down the street - during the time scheduled for their class party. These are just a few of things they do. Thought this would help paint a more specific picture of how they integrate character into
just about everything!
One other thing - sorry this is so very long! - is that they have a Character Library, a separate collection of books that deal with only character-related things.
It includes books like the ValuTales, which focus on famous people who epitomized certain character traits.
For example, there's one called The Value of Caring: the Story of Eleanor Roosevelt. Wonderful book and what a great way to illustrate what caring is all about through the life of a woman who cared about others unlike anyone since! These are the books the teachers read to the students in their classes.
Anyway, enough said. Hope that helps!
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Post by swmom on Dec 2, 2003 17:35:02 GMT -5
I have to add this to my previous post. Sorry again for the length!
My daughter was telling me that today they sent Cougargrams to each other. The cougar is the school mascot. The Cougargram is a note telling someone
something nice about them. It's a ridiculously
simple idea but what a great way to foster good feelings between the kids!
Anyway, just wanted to share that.
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Post by TerryB on Dec 4, 2003 7:07:00 GMT -5
swmom,
I take our public school for granted. We have the "character-trait" of the month. Each child also gets "Raved" about once per year. This child's strongest attributes are listed and praised on the school bulletin board. The child gets to bring in special things from home that represent the child's interest and family. This really helped my daughter once when she was feeling like a loser.
Terry
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Post by swmom on Dec 4, 2003 9:25:34 GMT -5
TerryB -
Isn't it amazing how these little bits of praise and feelings of success go such a long way with these kids?
They start to believe in themselves, that they can do
things right and be recognized for it. It's huge.
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Post by TerryB on Dec 6, 2003 7:34:37 GMT -5
It's absolutely unbelievable the impact at least for my daughter. But false praise has zero impact. They know when you are just pumping them up.
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We are so fortunate that our 9-year-old daughter attends a school that focuses on character development and works hard to integrate that into all areas. They assign a character trait to each month and then literally study it, read about it, etc. etc. all month long. At the end of the month, the children actually vote on the kids 
